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The Shape Of Water     HD720p 97MB   HD1080p 174MB
An other-worldly fairy tale, set against the backdrop of Cold War era America circa 1963, directed by Guillermo del Toro (Pan's Labyrinth, Pacific Rim, Hellboy). In the hidden high-security government laboratory where she works, lonely Elisa (Sally Hawkins) is trapped in a life of silence and isolation. Her life is changed forever when she and co-worker Zelda (Octavia Spencer) discover a secret classified experiment. Doug Jones, Michael Shannon, Michael Stuhlbarg and Richard Jenkins are also part of the cast.

The Snowman     HD720p 93MB
Tense thriller directed by Tomas Alfredson (Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, Let the Right One In), based on a novel by Jo Nesbø. When an elite crime squad's lead detective (Michael Fassbender) investigates the disappearance of a victim on the first snow of winter, he fears an elusive serial killer may be active again. With the help of a brilliant recruit (Rebecca Ferguson), the cop must connect decades-old cold cases to the brutal new one if he hopes to outwit this unthinkable evil before the next snowfall. Charlotte Gainsbourg, Val Kilmer, Sofia Helin, David Dencik and J.K. Simmons are also part of the cast.
Tense is fine, I only often wish such movies were less gruesome.

Professor Marston and the Wonder Women     HD720p 84MB
Biographical drama described as a a superhero origin tale unlike any other. It tells the story of what inspired Harvard psychologist Dr. William Moulton Marston (Luke Evans) to create the iconic Wonder Woman character in the 1940's. While Marston's feminist superhero was criticized by censors for her 'sexual perversity', he was keeping a secret that could have destroyed him.His muses for the Wonder Woman character were his wife Elizabeth Marston (Rebecca Hall) and their lover Olive Byrne (Bella Heathcote), two empowered women who defied convention: working with Marston on human behavior research - while building a hidden life with him that rivaled the greatest of superhero disguises. Connie Britton is also part of the cast. Written and directed by Angela Robinson (D.E.B.S.).
First thought this is a cheap attempt to piggy-back on the Wonder Woman movie. But this is an interesting story.

Kingsman: The Golden Circle     HD720p 69MB   HD1080p 129MB
Full trailer for the sequel, again directed by Matthew Vaughn (Kick-Ass, X-Men: First Class, Layer Cake). This time our heroes face a new challenge. When their headquarters are destroyed and the world is held hostage, their journey leads them to the discovery of an allied spy organization in the US called Statesman, dating back to the day they were both founded. In a new adventure that tests their agents' strength and wits to the limit, these two elite secret organizations band together to defeat a ruthless common enemy, in order to save the world, something that's becoming a bit of a habit for Eggsy (Taron Egerton). Colin Firth, Mark Strong and Sophie Cookson also return. Cast additions are Julianne Moore, Halle Berry, Channing Tatum, Jeff Bridges, Pedro Pascal and Sir Elton John.

Only The Brave     HD720p 90MB
Drama based on the elite crew of firemen (Josh Brolin, Miles Teller, Jeff Bridges, James Badge Dale, Taylor Kitsch) called the Granite Mountain Hotshots from Prescott, Arizona who battled a wildfire in Arizona in June 2013 that claimed the lives of 19 of their members. As most of us run from danger, they run toward it. Jennifer Connelly and Andie MacDowell are also part of the cast. Directed by Joseph Kosinski (Oblivion, TRON: Legacy).
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A Wrinkle In Time     HD720p 69MB   HD1080p 127MB
First trailer for this epic adventure based on Madeleine L’Engle's classic which takes audiences across dimensions of time and space, examining the nature of darkness versus light and ultimately, the triumph of love. After the disappearance of her scientist father (Chris Pine), three peculiar beings (Oprah Winfrey, Reese Witherspoon, Mindy Kaling) send Meg, her brother, and her friend to space in order to find him. Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Michael Peña, André Holland and Zach Galifianakis are also part of the cast. Directed by Ava DuVernay (Selma, The 13th, Middle of Nowhere). To be in theatres next spring.
I suspect you have to be familiar with the book to be able to appreciate the trailer.

Blade Runner 2049     HD720p 89MB   HD1080p 166MB
Second full trailer for the sequel that takes places thirty years after the events of the first film. A new blade runner, LAPD Officer K (Ryan Gosling), unearths a long-buried secret that has the potential to plunge what's left of society into chaos. K's discovery leads him on a quest to find Rick Deckard (Harrison Ford), a former LAPD blade runner who has been missing for 30 years. Very diverse cast includes Ana de Armas, Sylvia Hoeks, Robin Wright, Mackenzie Davis, Carla Juri, Lennie James, Barkhad Abdi, Hiam Abbass, Dave Bautista and Jared Leto. Directed by Denis Villeneuve (Arrival, Sicario, Incendies).
The visuals are still tempting. But, I hesitate to mention it, I have problems with Gosling and Leto here.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi     HD720p 117MB   HD1080p 197MB
Three minute behind the scenes featurette for the eighth episode, written and directed by Rian Johnson (Looper, Brick, Brothers Bloom), to be in theatres at Christmas. There isn't much yet in terms of official summary other than Rey continues her epic journey with Finn, Poe and Luke Skywalker. Many actors from the last few decades return, new additions are Laura Dern, Benicio Del Toro and Kelly Marie Tran. Last time it was Daniel Craig, this time imdb lists Tom Hardy as a possible stormtrooper.
As much as I enjoy seeing the footage, the actors and the characters, the promotional lines they are forces to say are so off-putting. Wish there was a version without that.

Women Who Kill     HD720p 73MB
Dry comedic drama in which commitment phobic Morgan and her ex-girlfriend Jean, hosts of a female serial killer-centric podcast, still show all the signs of being a couple. But everything changes when Morgan falls hard and fast for the mysterious Simone (Sheila Vand), who may or may not be a killer.
Looks entertaining.

The Layover     HD720p 93MB
Lowbrow comedy about two single female best friends (Alexandra Daddario, Kate Upton) who find themselves competing for the same guy (Matt Barr) during an extended layover in St. Louis when their plane is rerouted due to a hurricane warning. Matt Jones, Rob Corddry, Kal Penn and Molly Shannon are also part of the cast. Directed by William H. Macy (Rudderless).
Not sure what compelled Macy to direct this. Besides the obvious.
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Darkest Hour     HD720p 91MB
Historical drama that begins on the eve of World War II as, within days of becoming Prime Minister of Great Britain, Winston Churchill (Gary Oldman) must face one of his most turbulent and defining trials: exploring a negotiated peace treaty with Nazi Germany, or standing firm to fight for the ideals, liberty and freedom of a nation. As the unstoppable Nazi forces roll across Western Europe and the threat of invasion is imminent, and with an unprepared public, a skeptical King, and his own party plotting against him, Churchill must withstand his darkest hour, rally a nation, and attempt to change the course of world history. Kristin Scott Thomas, Lily James, Stephen Dillane and Ben Mendelsohn are also part of the cast. Directed by Joe Wright (Atonement, Pride & Prejudice, Hanna).
Bring on the awards! IMDb's trivia page often has become full of inane facts, but in this case I'm amused to learn that Oldman is the fifth 'Harry Potter' actor to portray Churchill after Michael Gambon, Timothy Spall, Brendan Gleeson and Robert Hardy.

Final Portrait     HD720p 15MB
UK trailer for this biographical drama with comedic elements set in Paris in 1964 that peers into the workshop and personality of Swiss painter and sculptor Alberto Giacometti. Giacometti (Geoffrey Rush) is the one who decides when it is time for work, drink, doubt, destruction, flirtation or laughter in his studio. An established artist whose works fetch record prices, he hides his earnings in his studio. This is just one of the causes of many an argument with his wife (Sylvie Testud), another being the fact that his mistress (Clémence Poésy) receives all his attention. His brother (Tony Shalhoub), also an artist, is all too familiar with his idiosyncrasies. One day, Giacometti asks American art critic and biographer James Lord (Armie Hammer) to pose for him. But their sittings, scheduled to take a week, are frequently interrupted by visits to the bistro or long car rides, with no end in sight. Written and directed by Stanley Tucci (Big Night, Blind Date, The Impostors).
I suspect the first half of the trailer overstates the funny bits, but this looks much more interesting and entertaining than most biopics. It helps that it takes place over the course of about two weeks.

Dave Made a Maze     HD720p 77MB
Indie comedy in which an artist who has yet to complete anything significant in his career, builds a cardboard box fort in his living room out of pure frustration, only to wind up trapped by the fantastical pitfalls, booby traps, and critters of his own creation. Ignoring his warnings, his girlfriend leads a band of oddball explorers on a rescue mission. Once inside, they find themselves trapped in an ever-changing supernatural world, threatened by booby traps and pursued by a bloodthirsty Minotaur.
This looks like a lot of fun and highly inventive.

Borg vs. McEnroe     HD720p 24MB
European trailer for this sports drama set in 1980 in London. The rainiest summer in decades. The world is waiting to see the number one tennis player in the world, Björn Borg (Sverrir Gudnason), claim his fifth Wimbledon title. But few know of the drama behind the scenes: at only 24, Borg is close to the end - run-down, worn out and ridden with anxiety. Meanwhile, the challenger John McEnroe (Shia LaBeouf), 20, has decided to replace his former hero on the Wimbledon throne. Stellan Skarsgård, Tuva Novotny and David Bamber are also part of the cast.
Looks more interesting than I would've assumed. Though it is worth mentioning that both lead actors are more than a decade older than the characters they are portraying.

Footnotes - Sur quel pied danser     HD720p 67MB
If you want your musical a little less Hollywood glamorous and more working-class socialist, but still whimsical and not too realistic: It's about Julie (Pauline Etienne), a young woman struggling to make ends meet. Living out of a backpack, she spends her days jumping from job to job until she's finally offered a temporary job at a women's luxury shoe factory. After making friends with the spunky receptionist and a charming truck driver, Julie thinks the hard times are behind her. But her dreams of stability collapse when management threatens to close the factory. As her group of female colleagues go on strike, the truck drivers side with the company's scheming CEO. Julie must choose whether to keep a low profile (and a shot at permanent employment) or to fight back on the picket line.
Now in limited release in the US.


Jul. 14th, 2017 12:23 pm
darkages: (Default)
[personal profile] darkages
inspired by [personal profile] aroceu's sampler, here is my personal pick of favourites amongst my own fics, self-recs. i've sorted them by theme, not fandom, and i've tried to include fic from as many fandoms as i can in each category. this way, you can start with what you like, and branch out from there. so...
pick your poison )


Jul. 14th, 2017 12:08 pm
darkages: (hands)
[personal profile] darkages
word counts

year | published fic | unpublished fic I original | total
2004 0 0 475 475
2005 0 0 6755 6755
2006 0 1047 22832 23879
2007 2633 7615 35429 45677
2008 0 15740 5314368883
2009 44615 0 3808782702
2010 66654 1290 55232123176
2011 70480 8146 28638107264
2012 22593 17300 1049 40942
2013 88544 22926 0 111470
2014 101455 13242 0 114697
2015 184656 26655 462 211773
2016 190352 68561 83510 342423
total: 1280116

a note on word counts )fandom cv )

Amazon Prime Day

Jul. 10th, 2017 10:37 pm
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[personal profile] ideallyqualia
Today, apparently, there was a glitch on amazon prime where several PS4 video games were temporarily $13 or $7 (including the new Crash trilogy, Kingdom Hearts 2.8, and KH 1.5+2.5). My sister and I tried doing it, but she took so long coming online to talk (since we're on opposite sides of the US right now) that we actually lost out on the deal. Too bad. I'm not exactly complaining since I already have Crash, the original KH games instead of the remixes/remastered ones, and a bunch of other games, but I'm still pretty out of the loop on newer KH content so that would've been nice. I heard several other things were ridiculously cheap today (probably also via glitch) but my desire for material goods is so low nowadays that I can't bring myself to care about anything other than niche hard to find merch and video games I already have.

Netflix, god why.

Jul. 10th, 2017 08:45 pm
inkstone: Rurouni Kenshin's Yahiko & Misao smacking their heads (facepalm)
[personal profile] inkstone
I've gotten so spoiled by Crunchyroll and FUNimation, which give me nice simulcasts of currently airing anime. So much so that I've forgotten how to look for fucking fansub torrents. I don't think I've looked for them in years! Never mind the fact that Crunchyroll and FUNimation kind of decimated fansub groups due to making currently airing anime available so easily. To be clear, I'm not really complaining about this. The industry complains about piracy. I say that you fight piracy by making it easier to obtain legal copies. People are lazy. I am lazy. I'm happy to fork over a monthly subscription fee so I can watch current anime in one place via my PC, Roku, phone, tablet, etc.

I am, however, complaining about fucking Netflix, which licensed Kakegurui (based on the female gambling manga I raved about on Twitter a couple years back) and decided to... wait until the season is over and drop it in one completed batch? Okay, like, I get this is their brand. Binging is Their Thing. But learn a little something about your fucking audience! Anime fans do not want to wait a month after the entire season is over to watch the entire series at once! We want to watch the series one episode per week! THAT IS HOW OUR FANDOM WORKS.

Ugh. I am so resentful that I'm having to pirate this show. I'm happy to support it, but I'm also not waiting until October or November to watch it! Jesus, the show has no chance of blowing up because of this. None. Literally none. Anime fans will be moving onto new and shiny fall anime by then!


Bird by Bird -- Fandom Thoughts

Jul. 8th, 2017 09:43 pm
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[personal profile] ideallyqualia
Part of me wants to write a (locked) DW post on why I suddenly deleted my twitter last year, and how I started feeling uneasy with Haikyuu!! as a fandom, but before that, I want to think out loud about what I feel right now in my current fandoms.

Granblue fantasy fandom is a little strange in a friendly way. Since it’s a popular game, most fandom interaction is right there in the game, but there’s not competition in the traditional sense. The only real competition and relative rankings come in the form of guild wars/“Unite and Fight” which happens once every couple months, and lasts a few days. It’s what it sounds like: guilds compete against each other. Each guild fights monsters for points, and the guilds with the most points proceed to the real competition, where guilds are sorted into tiers and compete one-on-one to beat each other in points.

That’s the competitive part of the game. Outside of UnF each raid battle has some slight competitive action, too, but unless you’re trying to be MVP/Vice for rewards, you’re going to want to cooperate with others, or just give it your all. It depends on the raid and what rewards are given. I’ve already gone through a couple guilds (AKA crews) that didn’t do much for me, but now that I’m in a good guild, the idea is to come together at strike times (2 hours a day at most) to help each other in important raids. People talk in raid chats, but also in crew chats and on user profile message boards. Because the competition isn’t directly fighting each other, it feels friendlier than other online gaming I’ve done in the past, like pokémon showdown, although most gbf players are actually Japanese, and not all of them speak English, so if you want to communicate with them quickly in a raid you’re stuck with using stickers.

The point is that this feels way friendlier than other fandoms I’ve been in. Most engagement has nothing to do with fics/art/etc, just farming/grinding/working in crews, and so far I haven’t seen real problems (outside of a problem I had with one of my guilds, but even then it was a REALLY minor problem). Everyone’s just too busy grinding/farming to discourse/complain about anything. The English players I’ve met have been really nice, and I’ve also tried being helpful towards newbies/low ranked players since I’m already strong enough to not be an amateur anymore.

(I should also mention that this game has gacha, which, now that I think about it, DOES come with some salt here and there if you have amazingly good/bad luck.)

I have a ton of femslash ships, and there’s so many characters that shipping is a pretty easy deal. No one fights over them from what I see. I do write fic, but I haven’t felt any ideas for longish fics, so I don’t have any real pressure to do that many yet.

Speaking of fighting, though, I’ve come to realize a very sad thing. I’m not good at arguing. No matter how much education has, at various points in my life, tried to teach me how to argue, I can’t. (I only recently discovered I have autism, which is something that would’ve been helpful to know early in life, but at least I know now that that’s a problem). After last year, I’ve decided to withdraw and never engage in fandom discourse again since I can’t defend myself, get my ideas across, or understand people well enough to communicate like that. It’s the sad disabled truth, and it’s happened IRL; last year I had some problems with a professor, and I couldn’t defend myself. Even after he vaguely threatened to kick me out of the class because of my disability, I couldn’t defend myself or properly explain this to disability services, so nothing really happened (except being stuck with a professor I was terrified of, and for the entire semester). I had to explain in detail everything about the problem, and not only is my memory bad, I also just lack the foundation of basic social comprehension skills, and my professor got to sit there in person (every time I had to speak with disabilities) and argue down everything I said.

What’s really sad is that this makes me realize mentally disabled/autistic people probably don’t get to contribute to a lot of important discourse/social justice discussions/etc, even if it’s about us. It also means that I’m always going to be struggling with talking to disabilities for the rest of my life, since I can’t anticipate needs well until something’s already happened, and disability services usually go "oh that’s too bad. :/// let us know in advance next time” when I usually can’t. If I can contribute to anything, it’s usually being vague (and unhelpful), and I’m pretty terrible at understanding and verbalizing what I need, especially when it comes to accommodations. Nowadays I’ve just accepted it, and focus instead on what I can do, like reporting/criticizing shitty doctors and deleting rude comments (with a reply kicking them in the pants, of course, since they get the email on ao3 whether the thread’s deleted or not). I have no idea what this’ll mean when it comes to jobs, but after I became disabled I already dropped things I could no longer do, so I guess now I pick from the things that’re left and hope for the best. Fortunately I’ve met a lot of disabled people IRL who’re grad students and beyond, and that’s at least a little inspiring.

So anyway. In the past I’ve tried to approach problems/discourse/etc with level headed discussion but I’m not going to anymore, I’m just going to ignore it. There really is no way of doing anything in complicated discussion that won’t put me at a disadvantage.

On the flip side, I’m now trying to commit to writing disabled characters. And not just disability-coded characters that only I know are disabled, I mean truly, disabled. I don’t know why I’m still hesitant to this day about writing it. Maybe it's because I still feel uneasy with my disabled identity? After all the crap I've gotten from doctors I suppose it's no surprise I'm emotionally confused, but I still wish i wasn't. This isn't the post to go into disability identity though so I'm cutting off that train of thought. Anyway, I've had ideas for disabled characters (not OCs), but in the beginning they were things like "Shirabu is a dormant dragon living in uni and once his wings come in he basically has fibro symptoms/bone problems" but that's still weirdly hesitant with only my foot in the water. I want to do longfics with disabled characters! If people get to tell their stories about queer characters I should get to do it too (I'm queer too but disability is usually in the forefront of my mind since that affects me every second). I probably won't get much attention but I've been that way since the start.

I don't know what to do with autistic characters, though. I've been writing a couple characters as autistic for a long time now but I haven't bothered to tag it or make it explicit. Should I? It feels weird too, like going through my fics and tagging almost all of them with fluff since they're already fluffy and deserve the tag (except weirder).

With regards to Haikyuu!!, I also still don't know what I feel. I'm definitely exasperated at the fandom, but after like a year of avoiding fandom interaction because of deleting twitter/virtually abandoning tumblr, I don't feel particularly exhausted anymore. Just annoyed and exasperated. I'm too attached to two characters (Shirabu and Ushijima) to want to give them up just because of people. So I'm writing and uploading, but not reading as much as I used to. Which feels rude, but I'm still doing my best while avoiding potential explosions (and which is still impressive because I'm mentally disabled, after all, and reading/writing is much harder for me, and I could just be sleeping even more or watching TV). In the past I was definitely exhausted, and sometimes I felt like I was eternally pissed off.

I’m putting a rambly rant under a cut. )

I've noticed, though, that still participating in fandom is worth it. When I became disabled and went on a health leave, I didn't know what I would do. I had to drop the pre-med track and music. Before I was disabled I pushed myself academically and tethered my life to it, and after, I couldn't keep doing that while keeping the same grades. I had to give up on being academically optimistic and settle for realistic. Fanfic/writing gave me something to hold on to, I think. I didn't feel a sense of loss going from intense schoolwork to writing. I didn't feel stressed like I need to be productive and can't sit still, because fanfic gave me a feeling of productivity. That wasn’t much of a concern anyway, but it really did help with the sense of loss, at least.

Nowadays I'm very comfortable with setting my own pace for work, since I've already been doing it for so long with writing. And I mean work in general, including schoolwork. I'm also more comfortable leaving things undone because there's too much on my plate; I can return to it later when I not only have the time, but also the right frame of mind, clear head without fogginess, and literary tools (new words fresh in my words, ambient poetry, etc) lingering in my head.

This doesn't change how I feel about criticism, though. It’s still stupid and useless for the most part — and by “most part” I mean when a stranger tries to give some anonymous “advice.”

That brings me to my next point: my academic writing skills haven’t gotten any better. I think they’ve gotten worse, even. In hindsight, some things are just inevitable; it was probably pointless writing papers on certain topics when it would just go over my professors’ heads — once in musicology, I wrote a review of a book we had to read, and I pointed out the bad aspects where the book tried to sexualize disabled people (I can’t even begin to explain why this topic appeared in a book for musicology) and my professor disagreed. Not only is it almost impossible for me to argue like I said earlier, but it’s also pretty impossible to talk about disability for a grade when my professor is an able-bodied person that doesn’t agree, and her word is final. Sometimes it’s stupefying how a professor’s word can be final; like I also said earlier, a professor threatened to throw me out of a class for being disabled, and when I tried to talk about my disability, he’d just say “no” and disagree, and I felt completely helpless without being able to add anything because all I could do was just repeat myself. And the rest of the academic papers I’ve had to write over the past year have been lab reports or scientific things, and I still feel like I didn’t get the grades I deserved, so I have no hope/enjoyment of lab reports/papers of any kind and therefore no prospects for what I want for a job, but that’s another lengthy uncomfortable topic for some other day.

So “I love to write and actually enjoy it, but my skill happens in a way that makes it completely useless” sums me up pretty well.

AU Exchange 2017

Jul. 8th, 2017 09:33 pm
ideallyqualia: (Default)
[personal profile] ideallyqualia
This is a dear creator letter for AU Exchange 2017. The requested fandoms are: Haikyuu!!, Magical Girl Raising Project, Bravely Default, Little Witch Academia, and Pokémon.

Coming soon!

Scratch that, my sign up has been deleted for being unable to be matched to anyone.